Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 14:35:33 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 14:35:33 GMT -5
Leah hated waiting. Waiting meant something bad was happening. Leah was never one who had that waiting to go to Disney or waiting to go out with guy she liked. Leah often waited to go see people who could die any second. She waited for her brother when hee first got cancer and her dad when he ended up dying on the table.
Here she was now waiting for a four hour surgery to be over. She bounced her leg and stared at the clock. The clock seemed liked it refused to move. She occisnally would check her phone in hopes someone would text her. Her mom was working, she couldn't get off work because they needed the money. So Leah was here by herself just waiting on her brother.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 14:42:02 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 14:42:02 GMT -5
It was safe to say that today was a stressful one for Clara. She had chemo in the morning, which usually mean that she would spend the rest of it in bed asleep. But today she decided to wait for Alec to be out of surgery before she went to her room. It was probably a bad idea, and she knew if Sierra saw her, she'd send her straight to her room, but it was worth a shot.
Clara smiled a little when she saw Leah, though she hesitated at the thought of approaching her. Did she really want Leah to see her like this? Half of her hair had fallen out in uneven patches at this point, and the hair that was left was bright purple. But Clara decided that Leah had probably seen people in much worse condition that she was in. "Hey Leah," Clara said as she took the seat next to her.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 14:48:04 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 14:48:04 GMT -5
"Hey," Leah said. She looked over at Clara. She smiled a little. "I like your hair," Leah said. Leah knew everything about Alec's life. Leah was the only one who ever came to visit Alec. He knew how Clara and Alec were bestfriends and she knew that Clara had to start chemo. She liked Clara. She found herself talking to her Clara with Alecsometimes.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 14:54:04 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 14:54:04 GMT -5
Clara bit her lip, looking down at the floor slightly. "Thanks," she said quietly, but she knew that Leah was only complimenting her out of pity. Clara yawned slightly, but tried to hide it the best she could. She didn't want to be as tried as she was. The exhaustion that came along with chemo was Clara's least favorite thing, not that she actually had a favorite.
"How long has he been in there?" Clara asked because she didn't know how much longer she would have to stay awake.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:00:01 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 15:00:01 GMT -5
"Only thirty minuets," Leah said quietly. "There's still another three and a half hours at least," Leah said she leaned back in her chair. "You look exhausted. You should go sleep," Leah said quietly. She could only imagine what chemo felt like. She bet it was horrible. Watching someone go through it was horrible enough.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:08:34 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 15:08:34 GMT -5
Clara shook her head. "I'll be fine," she said, though she knew it wasn't true. But it wasn't threatening to her health if she waited a little while to go to sleep, so she would wait for Alec. "So how have you been?" she asked. She was really just trying to make small talk, but it never hurt to be hospitable, right?
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:12:36 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 15:12:36 GMT -5
"8 ve been good. I've been working a lot to get Alec something nice for Christmas. How've you been?" Leah asked. She smiled at Clara. "How much trouble have you and Alec been getting into?"
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:18:49 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 15:18:49 GMT -5
Clara laughed a little. "How much trouble can you get in when you're dying?" Clara said without thinking. It was a line she'd used a million times with the nurses and other patients, but she hadn't thought about how bad it would be to say to Leah. "I'm sorry, that was insensitive." Her eyes darted back to the floor, and she fiddled with her fingers as she scolded herself internally.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:29:08 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 15:29:08 GMT -5
Leah pursed her lips when Clara said that. If instantly made her think of Alec. It left her wondering if that was the last time she'd ever be able to see Alec. "Oh no its okay," Leah said. "Alec jokes around like that all the time." Except it was clear Leah knew it wwant joking and the chance of them living were one in a million.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:32:39 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 15:32:39 GMT -5
Clara nodded. "That's for sure," she said. "But it bothers me when he says it too." Clara hated the idea of Alec dying. If he died, what hope did she have of ever making it past this? Even if she survived, what would she have left to live for? Her family, sure, but she'd barely seen any of them in over a year.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 15:46:56 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 15:46:56 GMT -5
"Clara," Leah said quietly. "I know you think you have no one left but you still have Alec and I think you're pretty cool too. Most people don't stuck with my brother because his cancer but you did and that means you matter to me because you actually cared about my brother when all his friends left him. So if you think if you died everything would be okay I wnat you to know that it wouldn't and I'm not just saying that to make you feel better," Leah said quietly. She did like clara, she liked talking to Clara. Clara and Alec were as far as her social life went.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 16:52:10 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 16:52:10 GMT -5
Clara bit her lip. "Thanks, I guess," she said. "And I know. I know that people would care if I left. I think it's just easier for me to act like no one would care...so that way I won't feel so bad about leaving." Clara twisted her fingers together idly, trying not to feel as awkward as she did. Leah barely knew her, but she cared about her either way. Everyone seemed like they cared so much, but Clara didn't want them to. She didn't want to hurt them.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 22:28:03 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 22:28:03 GMT -5
" How does it feel to have cancer?" Leah asked quietly. "Do you like - do you feel like you're dying? Like if the doctors never said you were dying would you think you're dying? " Leah asked. She didn't know that the doctors told Alec he only had a few months to live. He didn't tell her only their mom, Alec and Clara knew. If Leah did know she'd be devastated. It was better to keep her in the dark.
|
|
Jun 23, 2016 14:50:43 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
Bio
|
|
Cancer Ward
214
Click
|
Don't give me any of that Hazel Grace bullshit.
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 22:38:00 GMT -5
Post by Clara Austin on Nov 26, 2014 22:38:00 GMT -5
Clara shrugged. "You have good days and bad days," she said. "Chemo days are the worst. Dying sucks, but they try to keep you hopeful. The doctors won't tell you you're dying unless they're one hundred percent sure, and even then they still tell you that it might not happen. They've never given me any time estimate or anything, but you can kind of tell when you're gonna bite it. For me, I'd give myself a few more months, maybe." Clara then realized that she was probably being insensitive again, but Leah asked, and when you asked Clara a question, you got the full answer whether you wanted it or not.
|
|
Jan 7, 2015 19:09:08 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Group
Posts
|
|
Relative/Visitor
36
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 26, 2014 22:43:50 GMT -5
Post by Leah Kress on Nov 26, 2014 22:43:50 GMT -5
Leah nodded, she tried to think about it but she couldn't begin to imagine. "Thanks by the way for being blunt. Everyone just seems Me as the girl who's brother and father has cancer, it's kinda annoying. I'm not gonna break If you tell me that stuff like I was in the room when someone died I think I can handle cancer answers to questions I ask," Leah said breathing a sigh of relief then realizing she just completely ranted. "Sorry that was not supposed to be a rant."
|
|